It’s about 2 o’clock in the afternoon, Pacific Standard Time, and I’m in downtown San Francisco standing beneath Route 80. I’m exhausted, and the Starbucks vanilla latte I called “breakfast” is not doing its job. Hours earlier, midnight, when I touched down in the City by the Bay after being flown out of Philadelphia, PA, I climbed into a limousine and drove in style to my hotel, the St. Regis, succumbing to jetlag-induced sleep. All of this – the flight, the limousine, the five-star hotel – was orchestrated and paid for by THQ. I’m here to cover a press event for Metro 2033, their upcoming post-apocalyptic shooter set in the ruins of Moscow, Russia. Under different circumstances I would not allow THQ to curry favor by footing the bill – integrity, journalistic ethics, that whole thing – but I’m a destitute student, one who does not get paid to be a journalist. One who has never been to San Francisco, video game journalism’s Mecca. How could I turn down this opportunity?

So here I am, waiting under an overpass to gain entry to Temple, a local nightclub where THQ is hosting their Metro 2033 event. I am not alone. There are twenty or so other writers with me, hailing from Destructoid, GamingNexus, 1UP, GameRevolution, and a handful of other outlets I’m not as familiar with. All of us are snapping photographs and scribbling in our notepads. I jot down observations in my own Moleskin. I observe how post-apocalyptic the underside of this highway overpass looks and feels. Battered, worn, abandoned. I wonder, “Was this intentional on THQ’s part? Am I being subtly manipulated, unconsciously coerced into the right mindset for playing Metro 2033?” Probably.

When we are finally let inside, daylight gives way to darkness. A few flights of stairs later, that darkness is broken by harsh red lights mixed with roiling, manufactured fog. We’re in the basement, I think. Or what was once the basement. Right now, for all intents and purposes, it is a Russian fallout shelter. There’s barely any lighting, and people dressed as Russian paramilitary have taken over the place. In the back, a raggedly dressed man plays a guitar beside a rusty oil drum that’s aflame. Seated next to him is a boy, maybe ten years old, whose face is dirty and whose clothes make relief victims seem fashionable. THQ has gone through enormous trouble, not to mention expense, to construct this spectacle. But will Metro 2033 be worth it?

The short answer is “yes.”  Though, my reasons for thinking so probably won’t resonate with most gamers. Nor do I think, when the game is released in March, it will make a very big splash. Before I tell you about Metro 2033, I want to quote a very famous journalist: “The idea of trying to cover this race [event] in any conventional press sense was absurd.” So I’m not going to. I refuse to remove myself from the equation. You’re stuck riding shotgun with me. Now, about Metro 2033…

If you didn’t already know, Metro 2033 is a shooter. And if you didn’t know, you do now. Either way, you probably agree that little more needs to be said. Anyone reading this is undoubtedly a gamer, and as such they either play shooters or know enough about the genre to know what the hell I’m talking about. Well, Metro 2033 is a shooter through and through. It is a shooter that has been stripped down and laid bare. It is a raw, earthy experience. There are no biotic powers, no plasmids, and no calling in air strikes. The player is left only with their gun and its bullets to brave the harsh wilderness the world has become. This is a game about the beauty in struggle, and that beautiful struggle is what has me smitten.

I’ve lost interest in deconstructing games to their base components, then trying to reassemble them to see if they add up to a $60 value. I only care about the totality of my experience – the good, the bad, the ugly, and how they all come together. At the core of Metro 2033’s totality, what everything else about it must come back to, is the story it tells. Rather, I should say, the story the book it is based on tells. “The game actually follows the book very, very closely,” Luis Gigliotti, creative director at THQ, told me, “It is a beautifully scripted, cinematic, linear experience.”

Metro 2033, the novel, was written by Russian journalist Dmitry Glukhovsky and published online in 2002. By 2005, it was printed and quickly became a nationwide bestseller. The novel tells the story of Artyom, hero of both the game and the novel. Artyom lives in a world that has seen better days. After some catastrophic atomic war, the remains of Russia’s populace retreated underground to the safety of Moscow’s metro system, which also serves as a massive, web-like fallout shelter. This is the world Artyom has known his whole life – the oppressive, claustrophobic confines of a ruined metro system and its rabid, increasingly insane inhabitants. But they are the least of his concerns. To make matters worse, post-blast Russia is also plagued by the “Dark Ones,” living shadows that look like silhouette cutouts of the cosmos. The danger they present is an unorthodox one. The Dark Ones attack psychically, wreaking such havoc on the human mind that a few days later their victims drop dead. Through contact with a man named Hunter, Artyom is tasked with nothing short of saving what’s left of the world.

In between a few glasses filled with rum and coke, I played roughly five hours of Metro 2033. When I finally put the controller down, what remained with me was a sense of immersion – an illusion all my favorite shooters have managed to cast over me. Half-Life 2, for example, was a game where the lines of reality at my peripheral vision started to blur, and slowly I became Gordon Freeman. This phenomenon happened again with Metro 2033, interrupted only by random, seemingly useless cut-scenes that break away from Artyom’s perspective. The rest of the game is experienced through Artyom’s eyes. To help sell this, developer 4A Games removed almost any hint of a HUD. Only when the player swaps between weapons and ammunition is their screen invaded by a menu system acid trip. The rest of the game’s information is presented contextually. Artyom’s journal, which acts as an outline for mission objectives, is presented as an actual journal that Artyom holds up in his right hand and illuminates with a lighter held in his left hand. When going topside Artyom requires a gas mask to survive. The gas mask adds a layer of distortion to the player’s vision – its edges streak with water and sweat, and his line of sight is broken by cracks and imperfections that contribute to the overarching anxiety built into Metro 2033. Artyom is only allotted 15 minutes of breathable air, which the player keeps track of via a gauge strapped to Arty’s left wrist. The result of all these touches is something that feels less like a Metro 2033 video game and more like a video game adaptation of Metro 2033. As Gigliotti put it, “the gameplay reinforces the fiction even more.”

This notion of Metro 2033, the game, as an adaption of the novel is reflected not only in how the game is played, but also the challenge in playing the game. Metro 2033 is fucking hard. I heard these sentiments echoed among the other writers. Sadly, this is something many Western gamers – especially console owners – will struggle with. Western gamers hate to “pussy out” and play on Easy Mode. Instead, they’ll vilify the Normal difficulty setting as being “broken,” maybe “unbalanced.” But to divorce playing Metro 2033 from the rest of the experience is to play it all wrong. Video games shouldn’t cater to our needs or wants. In a post-apocalyptic nightmare world populated by mutant monsters and human detritus, a persistent tension sells me on the experience even more.

Early in the game, after Artyom leaves his hometown (homestation?), Exhibition, he winds up at another station, Riga. There he meets a possibly unstable fellow nicknamed Bourbon. Bourbon hires Artyom to escort him to Dry Station. Early into the journey there is an encounter with bandits. A firefight breaks out. During my first attempt, I approached the situation hoping to strongarm my way through it. I ran in, guns blazing. Within moments, I was a corpse. In my second attempt I took things more slowly. I shot out lights in order to take cover in darkness. I picked off enemies one at a time, looting their corpses while bullets whizzed overhead. In the heat of battle, playing this sequence was the furthest thing from being fun. In fact, it felt more like work. But after the bullets stopped flying and I could let my guard down, the feeling of genuine accomplishment was worth all the nerve-wracking non-fun.

I reached this part about the same time as another writer seated near me. I overheard him complain to a THQ representative how it was difficult to distinguish allies from enemies, how it was a pain to loot corpses for ammunition, especially mid-firefight. Oddly enough, this is what stands out to me as a defining moment in Metro 2033, one where every aspect of the game gels together. I felt like this other writer just didn’t get it. Sure, I was on edge. Sure, I wasn’t having fun. But that just made me empathize with Artyom even more. I shared his anxiety, his fear.

That, in a nutshell, is Metro 2033. If you’re looking for a video game that plays it safe, that celebrates the complacency of our medium, that is more concerned with being a shooter than fitting shooting into the context of its story, then Metro 2033 probably won’t be for you. But if you appreciate when games try to be more, when games try to turn a genre into an art form, then play Metro 2033. It’s far from perfect, but its flaws are integral to the overall experience. Sure, maybe they make playing the game flirt dangerously close with a controller-throwing tantrum, but goddamn if that frustration doesn’t put me right there in the hellish Russian metro system with Artyom.

Uncharted 2: Among Thieves is a fucking amazing video game, and everybody knows it. On September 19, 2009, Chris Roper, Editor-in-Chief of the IGN PlayStation Team, published one of the first reviews of Uncharted 2. “There came a point when I was early in the game, and I couldn’t wipe the smile off of my face as I took cover, shot bad guys, and did all the stuff I remember making the first game great. This was like putting on an old pair of jeans or picking up one of your favorite books again – it just felt right.” Other reviewers would echo Roper’s sentiments. At 1UP.com, executive editor Thierry Nguyen awarded the game an A-plus. At EuroGamer, editor Tom Bramwell gave Uncharted 2 10/10, and called the game “an action-adventure masterpiece whose minor flaws are washed away on a tide of rhythm and spectacle – one that would still be an essential experience even without the option to pull your friends off cliffs and play capture-the-heirloom.”

There are 101 more reviews of Uncharted 2 documented on Metacritic, and a great deal of them must say the same thing. The game has a metascore of 96 right now. This is, of course, completely understandable. There are a lot of great video games out there, but none offer such a rich, seamless, cinematic experience. Uncharted 2 is simultaneously Naughty Dog’s homage to Indiana Jones and its very own Raiders of the Lost Ark. In his 1981 review for the Chicago-Sun Times, Roger Ebert wrote, “Two things, however, make Raiders of the Lost Ark more than just a technological triumph: its sense of humor and the droll style of its characters […] We find ourselves laughing in surprise, in relief, in incredulity at the movie’s ability to pile one incident upon another in an inexhaustible series of inventions.” These exact same sentiments have been used to describe Among Thieves. In essence, it is a playable incarnation of Raiders of the Lost Ark – a technological achievement wrapped in pure perfectly paced fun, packaged up and delivered for mass consumption. Nathan Drake is every bit as charming a skeptic and grumpy hero as Dr. Henry “Indiana” Jones, Jr. Where Harrison Ford channeled a very fallible humanness as Indiana Jones, Nolan North, a decorated veteran of video game voice acting, voices Nathan Drake. North makes Drake just as charming, cocky, and fallible as the good Dr. Jones. Drake and the rest of the cast of Uncharted 2 also happen to look more human than any video game characters to date. Naughty Dog put tremendous effort into making their hair, facial expressions, skin, clothing texture, and movement as convincingly realistic as they could manage. This may not seem like a big deal, but anyone who plays video games knows how puppet-like, how “off” the vast majority of video game characters are in their behavior. The result is a strong disconnect between the player and the character, which throws immersion right out the window.

This is not the case in Uncharted 2. And not just because of the game’s gorgeous visuals and witty, attractive cast, but also the game’s Hollywood-caliber voice acting and writing. Anthony Gallegos, reviews editor for GameSpy.com, sums up the collective thoughts of the review community when he writes:

…the story sounds like the premise for a cheesy and easily forgotten novel, but it’s saved thanks to wonderful dialogue that brings the characters to life, making them at once believable and fantastic. The quips they make to one another (and to themselves) convey that the amazing nature of what they see – and how they manage to make it through all this in one piece – is not lost on them. Even during the more expository portions of the story (especially the cut scenes), the banter between characters is so clever that I sometimes felt like I was watching a pair of old friends giving each other a hard time.

As great as Uncharted 2’s graphics, writing, and dialogue are, none of these elements are distinctive to video games. Uncharted 2 could have been made into a movie (which happens to be in the works) or a television show. Because of how engaging Nathan Drake and his friends are, because of how wildly successful Uncharted 2’s more cinematic qualities have been in the media, attention to its gameplay – that thing that makes it a video game – has been overshadowed and, in some cases, undervalued. Several reviews I read described Uncharted 2 as “Tomb Raider meets God of War.” This suggests that Uncharted 2 is little more than a cover-based shooter with some environmental exploration and puzzle solving thrown into the mix. In a really reductive sense this is exactly what kind of game Uncharted 2 is, but if you ask me, that’s a terribly defeatist attitude to adopt, especially for video game reviewers. And this reveals a huge problem with most video game reviews.

At websites like IGN, 1UP, and GameSpy, the average reviewer does little more than attempt to assess how fun a video game is, then assign it an “appropriate” score, usually a letter grade or numerical value between one and ten. Video game reviews are consumer reports. They deconstruct play into its basic design components – graphics, sound, gameplay, control, and story. This is like trying to review a music album based on the quality of the vocals, guitars, bass, and drums independently, a very asinine thing to do. Ultimately, video game reviews only serve to validate our opinions, which for most are formed long before a game actually comes out. Conversely, they may serve to oppose our opinions, in which case outraged (and dangerously insane) fans feel some unholy compulsion to log online and question the reviewers’ opinions. This, to quote Kurt Vonnegut, is like “a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae or a banana split.” Better yet, it’s like tilting at windmills. Either way, it makes gamers look like petulant assholes.

What the vast majority of video game reviewers fail to consider is what gameplay means in the context of the game as a whole. How does the experience of playing a game complement the rest of the experience in totality? To think one does not reflect the other is naïve. Or the result of bad game design. Imagine if we separated Ernest Hemingway’s prose from the entirety of his work. Take The Sun Also Rises for example. I could flip to any page in The Sun Also Rises and pluck a quote at random. There is a 99.9999% chance that it will contain the terse, tightly written prose that Hemingway is known for. And without being familiar with his works, all you will see are a handful of simple sentences. But that was Hemingway’s style, and partially what made him unique. As written in Wikipedia, The Sun Also Rises is “considered ground-breaking in its economic use of language for creating atmosphere and recording dialogue.” But look at it out of context? All you’ll see are simple sentences.

They expected their money the next day. We arranged to meet at Pamplona. They would go directly to San Sebastian and take the train from there. We would all meet at the Montoya in Pamplona. If they did not turn up on Monday at the latest we would go ahead up to Burguete in the mountains, to start fishing. There was a bus to Burguete. I wrote out an itinerary so they could follow us (p 90).

When removed from the rest of the book, those sentences read like the kind of sentences read aloud in a third grade elementary school English class. But we all know that, when it comes to novels, context is everything. It shouldn’t be any different for video games. Queuing up a video of Uncharted 2: Among Thieves on GameTrailers, one might easily dismiss the game as nothing more than another cover-based shooter. But this is seeing the game out of context. This is observing the game without the benefit of being familiar with its cast and how their behavior, during play, reflects the humanness Naughty Dog has strived so hard to nail. When reviewers (and gamers) fail to see the deeper meaning in Uncharted 2’s gunplay, when they fail to see the connection between how Uncharted 2 is played and the rest of what makes the game whole, they fail to recognize what makes video games, our medium of choice, unique over other forms of entertainment – play. And no game possesses gameplay that reflects its characters’ humanness, brings the entire experience together seamlessly, and immerses players as their anchor in the world (Drake) as effectively as Uncharted 2: Among Thieves.

When I set out to explore this idea, I contacted Joystiq’s Ludwig Kietzmann, with whom I seem to share the same tastes when it comes to video games. Ludwig reminded me how Uncharted 2 enhances the element of suspense by having a world that is just as fallible as Drake is. The game is peppered with moments that, though scripted, make us gasp, even momentarily panic, over Drake’s safety. Signposts buckle under Drake’s weight, and then fall away the moment he scrambles off them. Bricks crumble at his touch, support beams splinter and break, cable lines snap with an audible twang and send Drake flying towards some rickety structure that he barely manages to catch hold. And every time Drake flirts with demise we can’t help but think he just might not make it. But he always does, and we all know he will because the hero always comes out on top, but we still breath out “phew!” in sync with Drake.

Of course, there wouldn’t be so many ways for Drake to misstep and send a wave of anxiety surging through us if Drake didn’t possess a variety of ways to interact with the world and its inhabitants around him. Drake can climb trees, pipes, building facades, signposts, upturned cars and trucks, office furniture, and ice cream parlors. Drake can sneak behind enemies and incapacitate them without ever being seen. He can shoot with precision, or shoot from the hip while running, at the cost of precision. Drake can take cover by flipping over a table or desk and then blind-fire from behind. Drake can shimmy up a signpost and hang from one arm while shooting a handgun with his free arm. Drake can swim, roll, run, jump, and walk. In short, Drake is agile, in every way that a human being is. Again, this might not seem particularly noteworthy, but consider for a moment what most other video games do – and do not – allow players to do. In popular shooters like Modern Warfare 2, the studio pours all their effort into the mechanics of shooting – the feel of ammunition being discharged, the weight of a gun, the sound of it firing, its accuracy, the physics of bullet trajectory. Modern Warfare 2 perfects the experience of shooting in a video game, but only because that’s all there is to Modern Warfare 2. In Resident Evil 4 (or 5, for that matter), the player’s point of contact in the world is severely restricted in an effort to create suspense, but a different kind of suspense altogether from Uncharted’s. In specifically designed Quick Time Events, Resident Evil 4’s protagonist, Leon Kennedy, is revealed to be extremely agile and quick on his feet. Watch, as Leon deftly evades a shifting grid of searing hot lasers. But when conflicted by nonzombies while the player is in control, Leon cannot even move and take aim simultaneously. All he can do is stand motionless while nonzombies amble towards him with pitchforks and chainsaws in tow. Perhaps I missed the proverbial boat playing Resident Evil 4 so late, but this design choice served only to make me feel disconnected from Leon, and disabled as a player.

In Uncharted 2: Among Thieves, what the player sees in cutscenes they can execute when they’re playing as Drake. His athletic prowess is static. What we see him do in a cutscene we can make him do in the heat of battle or during exploration. As a result, players do not feel disabled or restricted but rather more connected with Nathan Drake as a person. This is what makes Uncharted 2 so special. Even though playing Uncharted 2 may not be a perfect experience, it is an experience that channels the fallible humanness Naughty Dog poured into the game’s design. It gives the intangible substance, especially with Drake. When Naughty Dog designed the gunplay in Uncharted 2, their philosophy was not “how do we make this shooting more realistic?” but rather “How do we make shooting feel natural for Nathan Drake, as a person?” The result? I look at my copy of Uncharted 2 and see not a plastic disc, but rather a friend, Nathan Drake, whose body we share in the game world.

“Show me another shooter where you have the degree of mobility allowed in Uncharted 2,” Ludwig said to me in one of our emails,” or one that integrates melee combat or scripted sequences just as well.” Better yet, show us another video game that builds its gameplay around a truly relatable hero.

new game +
(January 2010)

This past Saturday I visited the Second Circle of Hell – Lust. Actually, I visited Phoenixville, PA, but let’s be honest, there’s a bit of an overlap. While Phoenixville may lack all the scenic phallic and vaginal architecture that the Second Circle of Hell boasts, it certainly is just as desolate and detached from the world, and, like Hell, lacks any tourist appeal. So, not unlike the Inferno, I spent Saturday in something of a hellish concentric circle – physically, I was located in the rapidly flooding town of Phoenixville attending this year’s Game Expo, a yearly video game “summit.” But I was also in Lust, where I navigated a digital Dante through a series of oddly familiar puzzles.

As I traipsed about the Second Circle, pulling levers and moving statues, I also encountered misshapen female demons, which is to be expected when one is in Hell. What I didn’t expect, however, was when the first of these demons moaned erotically and pulled back her labia, revealing what I can best describe as a “vulvapenis.” I mean, there’s no escaping the obviousness of its female anatomy, but female genitalia don’t usually stick out several feet and writhe like a monstrous tongue. And they definitely aren’t used as a whip-like weapon.

At least, not on any of the women I’ve been with.

I am, of course, referring to Visceral Games’ Dante’s Inferno, the video game adaptation of 14th century poet Dante Alighieri’s literary treasure. I only spent twenty or thirty minutes at EA’s demo booth playing Dante’s Inferno, but even in this short time span I discovered exactly what I thought I’d find: a God of War-inspired action game so unabashedly proud of its inspirations that the term “clone” might be more appropriate than “inspired.”

Anyone who has seen the gameplay footage of Dante’s Inferno’s “Lust” stage will be familiar with what I went hands-on with at Game Expo. And if the identicalness to God of War wasn’t immediately apparent after watching the video, let me tell you: it is definitely apparent after spending more than two minutes playing Dante’s Inferno.

For good or bad, Dante’s Inferno is the video game equivalent of Kratos gutting Aries and wearing his flesh like a suit. Every inch of this game belongs, originally, to God of War — it just looks a little different. While my instant-recall of God of War’s control scheme is, well, nonexistent, Dante’s Inferno’s controls seemed, at the time, to be a mirror image. Even the right analog stick was used to make Dante roll and evade, something I’ve only ever seen in God of War. Equally similar was the demo’s pacing, which matched God of War’s step for step. At the start of the demo, Dante faces off against ever-increasing numbers of vulvapenis demons. After they are eradicated, Dante must then solve a series of consecutive puzzles in an effort to reach a demonic Cleopatra, the big bad of the Second Circle of Hell. In this case, Cleopatra becomes quite literally a big bad and battles against Dante in a sequence that feels blatantly inspired by the God of War II Colossus of Rhodes sequence. To top it all off, little details like how the player replenishes Dante’s health and magic bars by approaching magical fountains and hammering the controller’s face buttons repeatedly to break them and free the magical energies evoke distinctly “God of War” design tropes.

The only real difference between Dante’s Inferno and God of War is that while God of War tells a fictional story of revenge that is exaggerated to the point of being silly, Dante’s Inferno exaggerates a story of redemption based on an established piece of literature. And this, ultimately, is what gives me pause regarding Dante’s Inferno. As a “game” in the sense that most people define it, Dante’s Inferno excels. As it stands, there aren’t a whole lot of successful God of War re-skinnings, so the market hasn’t become choked with them – yet. Unfortunately, Visceral Games chose to dress their personal God of War in a skin of disservice to a work of fiction widely regarded as a masterpiece.

Because of this disservice I won’t be paying for Dante’s Inferno. Visceral Games’ adaptation is so typically “video game.” It perpetuates every mainstream stereotype of our hobby of choice, and at first glance seems to be little more than blood, guts, gore, sex, and tits. Sure, it’s good, even fun, but instead of really flexing some creative muscle with the medium, Visceral Games took the easy way out and made video game catnip for the bros to high-five each other over while playing. The shame of it is, Dante’s Inferno could have remained wholly intact without being called “Dante’s Inferno,” and in the process avoided all the criticism it’s received since inception.

A new Zelda is coming. It’s official. So now seems as good a time as any to discuss what direction Shigeru Miyamoto needs to take the franchise in. I emphasize needs since Miyamoto recently told Nintendo Power that the next Zelda wouldn’t be “radically different.”

This is a problem.

Change is a necessary component of growth. Unfortunately, change is one thing Nintendo’s not very good at. Sure, they changed how we play games with Wii, but we’re still playing the same games. It’s been over 10 years since Mario and Link made the jump from 2-D to 3-D, yet whenever I play their Wii counterparts I feel like I’m back in 1998. All that’s missing is Fred Durst’s inability to rap choking the radio airwaves.

Zelda needs to change.

In literature, every story has conflict, and conflict comes in many forms: Human versus Self, Human versus Society, and so on. So what is Zelda’s conflict? Human versus Nature. This is the core of the Zelda experience. Ganon, the Triforce, even Princess Zelda are all MacGuffins. They are plot devices that drive Link’s quest. The Legend of Zelda is the story of a boy lost in the woods, of Link’s journey through the myriad of environments that exist within the Kingdom of Hyrule.

Understanding this, we now know how Zelda needs to change – make the “Link versus Hyrule” experience more dynamic. One aspect of this is easily accomplished: expand Link’s physical abilities. The little Hylian is an athletic boy, an acrobat like Prince of Persia’s protagonist or Assassin Creed’s Altaïr. Yet, Link’s athletic prowess seems amateur in comparison. These guys can scramble up walls, shimmy across ledges, climb up curtains, swing across rafters, run along walls, and jump on their own. Why can’t Link interact with the world around him in the same fashion? The world of Hyrule should be a network of puzzles, like in Prince of Persia, and Link should have the necessary tools to solve those puzzles.

Furthermore, by powering up Zelda’s biggest design trope – items, such as the hookshot, bow and arrows, bombs, boomerang, and magic wands – Nintendo could take Link’s interaction with the world around him to the next level. What if Link could take a rope, tie it to an arrow, fire that arrow at a cliff ledge, and then climb said cliff ledge? The demarcation of where and what items can be used is passé. Come join the 21st century, Nintendo. Modern players want to cultivate a variety of means to overcome obstacles.

This idea should carry over to combat, as well. Take the Ice Rod. What if, in the next Zelda, the Ice Rod controlled similar to the Bow, and required precision targeting? Imagine being able freeze the legs of advancing enemies, immobilizing them, or freezing their sword arm, then disarming them with one quick-swap to the boomerang. These shades of nuance would add tremendous depth to the Zelda experience.

There is a second aspect to making the “Link versus Hyrule” experience more dynamic, and that’s scale. Look at Shadow of the Colossus. The Colossi create such an epic sense of scale, one that Shadow of the Colossus nails while Twilight Princess only flirts with, and Shadow of the Colossus is analogous to The Legend of Zelda in many ways. Like Link, Wander sets out to save a damsel in distress, Mono, who, like Zelda, is little more than a plot element that compels Wander’s quest. In his quest, Wander braves the Forbidden Land, a vast peninsula that rivals Hyrule in exoticism.

The Legend of Zelda should tear a page out of this book. Imagine scaling a hillside in the next Zelda, a hillside littered with towering trees and large rocky protrusions. This hillside continues to rise until it becomes mountainside. When you reach the precipice of this mountain, the ground shudders once, and then quakes violently. Suddenly the horizon shifts, and the sky whips into a blur of motion. This is no mountainside; it’s some massive creature that was embedded in the earth.

Now to bring some of the hypothetical elements discussed earlier into play. The player, as Link, struggles to ascend the back of this behemoth. When they finally reach its head, players use the hookshot to anchor on, then take a running leap off the creature’s brow, swing to eye level, and hack away at the massive orb until it’s reduced to goo. Enraged, the behemoth thrashes about wildly, forcing players to retreat to safety on the creature’s back until it calms.

I really hope I’m not alone in thinking the concepts described above paint an ideal picture of what Zelda could be (but probably never will). Of course, that’s our own damn fault, now isn’t it? We placate Nintendo by swallowing what they feed us without question, and then champion their games. I wonder: How can something that’s never really changed be any better or worse than the last version that came out? Oh wait, it can’t. Step it up, Nintendo.

It’s been two years since Sam Witwicky (LaBeouf) overloaded Megatron in Mission City, sacrificing the Allspark in the process. Now Sam is hoping to restore some normalcy to his life by shipping off to college on the other side of the country. Bumblebee has taken up residence in Sam’s garage, doing little more than collecting dust. Meanwhile, his Autobot pals have formed a joint task force led by Major Lennox (Duhamel) sanctioned to combat lingering Decepticon threats. Their latest mission brings the team to Shanghai, China, where they face down an enormous hydraulic mining excavator that is, naturally, a Decepticon in disguise. Optimus Prime flexes some robotic heroics and single-handedly dismantles the monstrosity, but not before receiving an ominous threat: the Fallen’s return is imminent.

So begins 147 minutes of madness, mayhem, destruction, and death. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is a frenetic mess that hits the ground running and never stops – relentlessly pummeling through brick wall after brick wall while dragging the audience wincing along for the ride.

The most painful part of Revenge of the Fallen is a pair of robotic twins, Mudflap and Skids, who are undeniably archaic racial caricatures, complete with enormous orb-like eyes, elephant-sized ears, buckteeth (one gold), and even some robotic nappy hair. The twins are insufferable, and only deliver lines that further perpetuate their stereotyping. What’s more, they serve no purpose other than comedic relief. Too bad they aren’t remotely funny, and instead succeed only in stealing screen time from characters people care about, like Bumblebee, Ironhide, Ratchet, or newcomers Arcee and Sideswipe.

The twins are one in a series of “what were they thinking!?” moments that become a running theme in Revenge of the Fallen. The film lacks anything closely resembling cohesion. Say what you will about the first Transformers, at least the plot moved forward at a steady rate and built up to the action-packed, Saving Private Ryan – but with robots – denouement. It had focus. It flowed. Revenge of the Fallen, on the other hand, has about as much focus as an ADHD-stricken 14-year-old boy sitting in math class who forgot to take his meds. Much of the film is best described as glorified tech demos, scenes that showcase intensely realistic CG but add nothing to the overall experience. The film’s central story becomes cluttered very quickly, and instead of having a simple, straightforward quest that strings together a series of epic action sequences we get a series of not-so-epic action sequences around which a patchwork story has been constructed.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is not without its enjoyable moments. When it’s good, it’s really good. But when it’s bad, well, it’s really bad. The opening sequence in Shanghai? Really Good. Sam’s mother getting high and running wild? Really bad. Soundwave? Really good. The “pretender” robot, Alice? Really bad. Optimus Prime’s big brawl in the forest? Really good. Sam taking a short trip to Robot Heaven? Really bad. Rinse, wash, repeat.

When Capcom unveiled the teaser trailer for Resident Evil 5 at last year’s E3, it was immediately put under a microscope to study the game’s supposed racial imagery. Many members within the video game community – white and black alike – voiced discomfort experienced while viewing the trailer, most notably game journalists Bonnie Ruberg and N’Gai Croal.

It’s a breath of fresh air that relative experts on video games are lobbying these complaints as opposed to lawyers or politicians who are unfamiliar with the media. Newsweek editor N’Gai Croal has run Newsweek’s video game blog “Level Up” since 2006 and has been the guest on countless podcasts, including 1UP Yours. Bonnie Ruberg blogs about video games for The Village Voice, and has written for Joystiq, Wired, and The Escapist. However, one should expect more from these experts on gaming than knee-jerk reactions over a teaser trailer.

When MTV Multiplayer’s Tracey John sat down with N’Gai Croal and asked for his thoughts on the Resident Evil 5 trailer, Croal admitted that his first reaction was, “Wow, clearly no one black worked on this game.” While it is true that no one “black” was involved in RE5’s development, this is due to the fact that the game was developed in Japan. Japan’s society is one mired in homogeneity – only 1.22% of their population is of non-Japanese descent. As approximately 99% of Japan’s population is native Japanese, the odds of finding a “black” game designer in Japan are slim.

Should Capcom have hired some sort of “Black Consultant” to assist with Resident Evil 5? Of course not. The very idea is absurd. The decision to use race in a creative undertaking does not demand approval by members of that race. Ultimately, the issue with Resident Evil 5’s trailer isn’t the developer’s problem, but the audience’s.

Both Croal and Ruberg point out undeniable racial imagery as the primary issue in Resident Evil 5’s teaser trailer, but fail to mention how perception of this issue is localized. The perceived imagery is the result of racial tensions unique to the United States, consequences of a nation’s history, not the world’s. The Japanese, for example, never experienced a massive civil war fought over the rights of an enslaved race. Because of this, the racial apprehension inherent to American culture does not exist in Japan.

Croal says:

“It’s like when you engage that kind of imagery, you have to be careful with it. It would be like saying you were going to do some sort of zombie movie that appeared to be set in Europe in the 1940’s with skinny, emaciated, Hasidic-looking people. If you put up that imagery people would be saying, ‘Are you crazy?’ Well, that’s what this stuff looks like. This imagery has a history.”

The problem is that one wouldn’t think twice about “skinny, emaciated, Hasidic-looking people” because no one, on average, would identify them as “Hasidic-looking”. Who even knows what that means? Would a “Hasidic-looking” zombie sport a yarmulke on his “Jew-fro”? Croal makes this comparison in an attempt to appeal to our collective understanding of the atrocity the Jewish people of Europe suffered during World War II. This is an exceedingly specific illustration, however, and cannot rightly be likened to the abstract imagery being scrutinized over in Resident Evil 5’s trailer.

There’s no denying that dark-skinned people are often ill-represented in the media. But, what exactly is historical about a bunch of dark-skinned people becoming zombified, flipping out, and being shot in defense? The so-called historical imagery is only made complete by the presence of the game’s “white” protagonist, Chris Redfield. Bonnie Ruberg acknowledges Redfield as “the same all-American boy who has been taking down old-school leg-draggers for years.” Beyond this small nod, however, Ruberg seems content on relegating Redfield as “the white protagonist” – dismissing his establishment in the franchise and the relevance in tapping him as the hero.

In addition to their failure to examine Resident Evil 5’s teaser trailer beyond the black and white, Croal and Ruberg’s arguments are rife with presumption. Ruberg points out how “it’s not just that these zombies are black, but that the uninfected black villagers are zombie-like too.” How, exactly, do we know these villagers aren’t infected? The Los Ganados in Resident Evil 4 were not afflicted with classical “zombification.” Instead, their zombie-state was triggered by parasitical mind-control and could be disengaged at the whim of their enslaver.

The real issue with race in gaming isn’t how dark-skinned characters are portrayed, but rather the absence of additional dark-skinned characters so that their differences become noticeable. Augustus Cole, A.K.A. “The Cole Train” of Gears of War fame is regularly called out for perpetuating a “black stereotype.” The issue with this is that Cole’s showboating college football star personality does exist. Anyone who has attended college can attest to this. It’s very unlikely that all dark-skinned people on the planet Sera act like Cole. Unfortunately, there are no other significant dark-skinned characters to make Cole seem unique and as a result he’s relegated to “obligatory black stereotype” status.

Croal and Ruberg’s impressions of the teaser trailer are mired in an innate negativity nurtured by North American upbringing. As a result, both critics failed to examine the potential positive influence Resident Evil 5 may yield. In a game populated by dark-skinned characters, there is a greater chance for several significant, dynamic dark-skinned characters to exist. Of course there will be a considerable number of drooling, snarling dark-skinned zombies. But Resident Evil is, after all, a series about putting bullets in the brainpans of humans become monsters – not humans that are monsters. This is not American social commentary. This is Japanese created entertainment developed for a world audience.

There’s so much we don’t know about Resident Evil 5. Do Resident Evil games typically showcase normal life activities? Or do they usually depict a “scary” situation wherein a hero is threatened by hordes of zombies and monsters? So far all gamers have seen is a light-skinned person shooting dark-skinned people. Capcom recently confirmed the existence of dark-skinned allies to aid Chris Redfield, female protagonist Sheva Alomar in particular. Ultimately, we must reserve judgment on Resident Evil 5 for a more appropriate time – when the game is released and the context of the game’s setting and scenario can be taken into consideration.

Ultimately, while both Croal and Ruberg’s initial impressions of Resident Evil 5’s teaser trailer are understandable, their conclusions leave much to be desired. Tackling the issue of how dark-skinned – or any minority characters – are represented in video games is no easy task. However, there are much more relevant angles of criticism to broach on the topic than what have been shown of Resident Evil 5 thus far. Ruberg’s article, “Resident Evil 5: White Man Shoots Black Zombies,” there is the downplaying of Chris Redfield’s relevance as a protagonist in the franchise as well as makes wild comparisons between “zombification” and the HIV/AIDS crisis in Africa. While the epidemic is tragic, it should not necessitate that all fictitious accounts of contamination in Africa be off-limits. Additionally, Ruberg fails to successfully support her supposition that the fear of “zombification” in Africa can be likened to the HIV/AIDs situation. This is markedly proven by her article’s Chris Redfield quotation pertaining to mounting casualties… the cause of which is unspecified in the actual trailer. In short, she is drawing conclusions based on a comparison that has no foundation.

N’Gai Croal’s criticism of Resident Evil 5 is similar to Ruberg’s in its conclusions, but the Newsweek editor at least admits that he is passing judgment on the game’s teaser trailer instead of the game itself. Also, Croal only approaches the abstract concept of racial stereotyping in video games rather than focusing on how Resident Evil 5, as displayed in known footage, possesses potential racial overtones. Again, this is because there is not enough information on the game to provide food for criticism. The circumstances surrounding Chris Redfield’s presence in Africa as well as the relevance of setting the game in that country are not revealed in the trailer.

It would be naive to suggest that racial inequalities in society have been abolished. They haven’t. These inequalities are still very much prevalent in society, North America’s especially. These inequalities must be challenged, but we must learn to pick our battles. When it comes to racial misrepresentations in video games, there are plenty of causes to take up. Resident Evil 5, at this stage, isn’t one of them.

As the Leipzig Games Convention draws nearer, companies have turned up the drip on their information IVs in an effort to amp up gamer interest. Among those companies is Propaganda Games, whose re-imagining of Turok has garnered even measures of positive and negative reception. Although a great deal of information pertaining to the change the franchise has undergone with this retcon has surfaced, there is still much about Turok that remains locked behind closely guarded doors.

After promising a few rounds of German beer at Leipzig (OK, not really), 1UP managed to coerce Josh Holmes, general manager and vice-president of Propaganda Games, to answer a few questions regarding what lies in store for Turok and its showing at Leipzig.

There has been a lot of gamer concern over the environments in the game. Holmes insists that Propaganda has only shown a fraction of what will ultimately appear in the game, and that it just so happens most of those have been jungle areas. At the risk of setting off the red alert of “spoilerage,” Holmes is remaining tight-lipped about what we can expect in the game, yet promises diversity both in the single player and multiplayer modes. The variety of levels will include lush jungle areas, dank swamps, mountainous terrain, scorched and barren wastelands, caverns, man-made facilities and even spacecraft. Given the otherworldly nature of Turok’s setting, even the jungles will show significant change as the player progresses deeper into the wild.

Just in case audiences think Holmes is all talk, he went on to confirm that a section of the game from a chapter called “Salt in a Wound” would be unveiled at Leipzig. In contrast to the outdoor environments showcased thus far, “Salt in a Wound” is an interior level and focuses on combating human opponents. Within the story’s context, the excerpt has Joseph Turok and Shepard navigating an abandoned facility with Roland Kane, Turok’s former mentor turned enemy hot on their tail. The derelict facility is reminiscent of something found in LOST. Surrounded by the untamed alien jungle, the man-made facility lies in ruins, damp and humid from where the jungle has broken in through damaged sections. Beams of light cut through the eerie darkness. Holmes expects this to be one of the coolest sections of the game, as it starts out quiet, ambient, almost chaotically beautiful before erupting into a firefight that lights up the darkness in blinding flashes.

The singleplayer campaign is shaping up impressively, but what’s in store for multiplayer–the meat of any great First Person Shooter? Once again, Holmes had an answer for our concerns. First, he shed some light on the confusion regarding Turok’s co-op. Originally, Propaganda cut co-op play from the game given Turok’s nature as a loner. The developers felt that support from a “buddy” would compromise the character’s integrity. After play testing began, however, the appeal of cooperative play became increasingly apparent. Soon enough, Propaganda decided to implement co-op into Turok, but not through the single player campaign. Instead, friends will be able to team up and challenge a series of missions inspired by the game’s story.

Now to clear up some of those rumors floating around—and in the process undoubtedly let down some hardcore Turok fans. The bad news: the ultra-powerful weapon Cerebral Bore, introduced in Turok 2: Seeds of Evil, will not appear in this new Turok. Holmes considers the weapon legendary—one of the greatest weapons to appear in a game of this type. Ultimately, however, the reinvention of Turok left no room to incorporate such a weapon and the team opted to leave it out, relegating it to an iconic element of the Turok of yore–a decision he staunchly believes was the right one.

Holmes reiterated that the new Turok would not be a part of the previous Turok titles’ canon. While inspired by the past games and comic books, in the end this new Turok will be fresh and original. That means no riding on dinosaurs, no Dinoids, and no crazy weapon-dinosaur hybrid monstrosities. As a result, the game’s final title will simply be “Turok.” No rebirth, no returns. Propaganda Games has taken a more realistic approach with Turok, to create something original and dynamic all while making sure to keep the trademark elements that originally made Turok a popular shooter.

iPhone, meet the world. World, iPhone.

What makes the iPhone unique is how it delivers its multiple functions: Say goodbye to a mess of buttons; all of the iPhone’s offerings are handled on a 3.5 inch touch-screen display, which can be personalized with Widgets, a playful name for optional on-screen accessories added to deliver information like the weather, stock reports, and more – all received on a mobile device in real-time.

The iPhone and its functionality come at a price: $499 for a 4GB model;$599 for 8GB.

Compared to its competition, like Samsung’s BlackJack, which runs $50-$80 with a two-year Cingular contract, you pay six times less than the iPhone for a device with almost all the same features. And while it may not sport iPhone’s screen interface, it does have a familiar one – one that’s been a standard for years now. The BlackJack, and other similar smartphones, can be bought with a $250 30GB iPod Video in tandem and still cost consumers hundreds of dollars less than the iPhone.

So, is iPhone just another smartphone all jazzed up with Apple aesthetics? And, do consumers even want an all-in-one device?

J.J. Sereday is a 21-year-old resident of Franklin Township, N.J. who has been using Apple’s computers and products for five years now. The young artist already prefers smartphones, and as an Apple user he’s “stoked” for the iPhone and all it has to offer.

“I personally am all about convenience,” Sereday said. “I would like to have one device to do everything.”

He said he wouldn’t have as strong of an interest in iPhone if it were just part cell phone, part MP3 player, like Motorola’s Chocolate. The scope of the iPhone’s connectivity and its intuitive user interface was what convinced Sereday the iPhone is worth every penny.

Sheena Lewoc, 20, who studies graphic design at Drexel University, is also a fan of Apple as well as smartphones; Cingular’s 8125 is her weapon of choice. Unlike Sereday, however, she won’t be so quick to adopt the iPhone.

“Price is an issue,” Lewoc said, adding that until iPhone comes down a bit, you won’t find her signing any two-year contracts with AT&T/Cingular. She noted how it took several generations of iPod before that device really took off with consumers, for all the “bugs” to be worked out. She said she expects similar development with the iPhone.

“I like Apple products, but I’d like to, you know, let everybody else test it out first and then go from there,” she said with a laugh.

Okay, so Apple-enthusiasts are pretty turned on by iPhone. Go figure.

What about PC users?

Anthony Nardone is a 23-year-old information technology/computer science graduate of LaSalle University, and certainly knows a thing or two about computers, technology, and smartphones; he’s an owner of Sprint’s PPC6700.

“It is true that many of the features of the iPhone have been around for years on the PocketPC/Windows Mobile platforms, but aside from stability improvements and minor innovations, the Microsoft platforms are becoming somewhat stagnant,” Nardone said.

Having dropped $500 for his smartphone, Nardone declined to criticize iPhone’s pricing. He said he feels the price is competitive when considering how much more storage capacity the iPhone offers and how much stronger a multi-media device it is.

Only a few people had anything negative to say about the iPhone when interviewed. Most barely knew about the phone, or admitted to a general prejudice against Apple products. Unfortunately for them, general interest in the iPhone is all-encompassing, not just limited to Mac-Heads; studies suggest they’ll soon find themselves in the minority.

In an online survey conducted by Digital Life America, a market research firm, it was discovered that out of 1,230 people definitely interested in immediate purchase of the iPhone, 31 percent were ages 15-24, 32 percent were 25-34 and 31 percent 35-49. The remaining 6percent were 50 and older.

These results may seem surprising to some, but as J.J. Sereday pointed out – his mom, and his grandmother, own iPods. Apple seems to have achieved their goal to create a medium that crosses generational gaps.

Still, the iPhone ain’t your grandma’s rotary phone. It is truly “higher IQ” than your average smartphone. Not only is it a phone, internet communicator and a fully equipped iPod, but sensors detect when the phone is raised to your ear and automatically shut down the touch-screen to avoid any accidental button pressing. These sensors also adapt on-the-fly when the iPhone is being held horizontally or vertically, changing the display accordingly.

The popularity of smartphones grows each year, with sales increasing 75.5 percent to 37.4 million units in 2006. As a result, these devices, like the iPhone, may be relegating flip phones to a Converse Chuck Taylor sort of “classic cool.” And with something as sleek and stylish as Apple’s iPhone, it’s sure to cut a strong corner for itself in the market. Unfortunately, with the exception of the die-hard Apple fan and the well-paid technophile, the average consumer may be slow to warm up to iPhone’s cost.

Come June 29, we’ll see just how strong Apple’s influence has become since permeating every household with i-Branding.

Usually around this time each year, press from all over the world would flock to Los Angeles to cover the media blitz that was E3. Well, times have changed, and the exposition is now a summit, been relocated to Santa Monica, and will be held in July instead of May. Fret not, kids, there’s a silver lining to those dark clouds! And that’s Sony Gamers Day, a pre-E3 press event, held in San Diego on May 17. More than thirty upcoming PS3 games were shown, along with a number of strong titles for PSP and even PS2. Here’s a look at five must watch titles for this Fall.

Folklore (PS3)

Folklore is one of those stunning, original titles that somehow always remain obscure (’sup, Okami?). Well, let’s change that. When two strangers – Ellen, a college student, and Keat, an occult journalist – are inexplicably drawn to an Irish town shrouded in mystery, they each embark on a journey wherein the actions of one character affect the story of the other. Gorgeous visuals and dreamscape environments have Folklore looking like it’s sprung from the mind of Tim Burton. But what really distinguishes Folklore from typical RPGs is how the two characters throw down. After weakening an enemy, its soul can be captured through use of the SIXAXIS’ motion-sensitive controls by twisting and pulling until the souls are wrenched free and absorbed to become new abilities. Think Ghostbusters meets What Dreams May Come in Ireland.

God of War: Chains of Olympus (PSP)

Another God of War, another visual knock-out, another epic adventure, Chains of Olympus pushes PSP to its limits. It tells the story of Kratos’ dark origins ten years prior to the first GoW, during his servitude to the Gods. The footage shown at Gamers Day was of the game’s beginnings, with Persians invading Attica. Blood-thirsty Spartan Kratos takes up arms, hacking and slashing his way through the city in typical God of War glory until a confrontation with a massive basilisk, reminiscent of the first game’s epic Hydra battle, cues a fade-to-black. What else is there to say? It’s God of War in the palm of your hand. So, uh, awesome? Yeah.

Heavenly Sword (PS3)

Nicknamed “Goddess of War”, Heavenly Sword boasts intense battle sequences and time-trigger events in the same vein as its male alter-ego. Nariko, the story’s heroine, wages war against a tyrannical empire with a mystical sword that transforms to adapt to her three stances of attack – Ranged, Speed, and Power. Savvy players will juggle between these stances to unleash devastating combos and defeat impossible odds. Heavenly Sword seems to have what it takes to rival God of War in a genre it reinvented. Unfortunately, much of what has been seen and played takes place in arenas, which could cause the game to become repetitive and stagnate quickly. The inclusion of exploration and huge fields of play, which has yet to be showcased, are essential for Heavenly Sword to realize its potential. Fortunately, like most PS3 games, Heavenly Sword is dazzling to look at and touts some pretty slick, mesmerizing animation. The question remains, are shiny things enough to distract players from any potential flaws?

Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction (PS3)

After debuting on PS3 with the more mature First-Person Shooter, Resistance: Fall of Man, Insomniac has returned to the franchise that put them on the market. Expect weapons and gadgets galore in Ratchet & Clank’s latest cosmic adventure, as well as a return to the series’ comedic roots. At Gamers Day, two new additions to Ratchet’s sizable arsenal were showcased. Both are true to the series’ originality – the Gelenator creates giant jello blocks that can be stacked and climbed on, while the Visi-copter, a miniature toy helicopter controlled by SIXAXIS, allows Ratchet to take down out-of-reach enemies. Far from a snapshot of reality, but rather keeping to its cartoon aesthetic, Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction is still graphically spectacular and decidedly “next gen”. Cityscapes are breathtaking, and the boss encounter shown was epic in scope. More Ratchet & Clank goodness to the fourth power is surely a winning formula.

Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune (PS3)

Much like Insomniac Games, Naughty Dog has taken a new direction with their debut PS3 title, Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune. It tells the story of a treasure hunter, Drake, and his perilous adventure to find his supposed ancestor’s lost fortune. The game is akin to a cinematic experience, with remarkable photo-realistic graphics that make it one of the most visually impressive games on PS3 and separate it drastically from Crash Bandicoot or Jak & Daxter. And how does it play? Imagine the best elements of Indiana Jones, Tomb Raider, Resident Evil 4, Gears of War, and Prince of Persia fused into one game. In short, Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune is a veritable sucker-punch of fun. Oh yeah, and there are pirates.

There’s just so much more worth noting, like John Woo’s Stranglehold (the prequel to his classic, Hard-Boiled, which is being squeezed into Stranglehold’s Blue-ray disc), or the two new SOCOM installments – one for PS3, Confrontation, and one for PSP, Tactical Strike. Hellboy, TimeShift, and LittleBigPlanet for PS3, Syphon Filter: Logan’s Shadow, Star Wars Battlefront: Renegade Squadron, and Jeanne D’Arc for PSP, Manhunt 2 for PS2 and so, so much more all wowed press at Sony Gamers Day. Suffice it to say, Fall ‘07 is shaping up to be huge for Sony as well as gamers, and if these titles are indicative of anything, PS3 is finally shaping up to be solid competition for the Xbox 360 and, by 2008’s end, a force to be reckoned with. Not so smarmy now, are we, detractors?

Boop-boop-boop – that all too familiar timer counts down to my respawn as I tap my foot impatiently. Suddenly I’m back in the fray, the mayhem of battle still going strong. A warthog tumbles over one of Valhalla’s hills and slams into my team’s stronghold. One of those Blue Spartan bastards has launched into the air, but is easy prey for our sniper who picks him off with a doctor’s precision. Ready to dive in, I mount a Mongoose and peel off towards the enemy encampment at break-neck speeds. With a grin, I take a quick detour to fishtail a wayward Blue Spartan. Score one for the Reds.

And welcome back to Halo.

On May 16th, the Halo 3 Beta opened to invitees who purchased Crackdown. The Beta retains the core “feel” that made this seminal first-person shooter series a resounding success. Considering that Halo 2, nearly three years old now, remains the most played Xbox Live title, it’s safe to say Bungie has some idea what they’re doing. And by adding a bevy of new vehicles, weapons, equipment, modes and features, Bungie has truly made “Combat Evolved” with Halo 3.

So what’s it play like? One of the newest features, the ability to retrieve and deploy gadgets, adds a whole new layer of strategy to the game. Get the drop, literally, on adversaries by setting off a Portable Gravity Lift that propels you upward to gain higher grounds. Or, more fun, to drop a volley of grenades and squeeze a few rounds off at earthbound Spartans. The Trip Mines, a trap, aren’t as reliable and are used primary as anti-vehicle weapons. On occasion a negligent Spartan wanders over a mine which is always good for a laugh.

There’s the Power Drainer, a device that emits a nexus of energy that drains an enemy’s life rapidly until well, you know. Conversely, the Door Shields are static energy films that allow players through, but block projectiles. Last but certainly not least is its cousin, the Bubble Shield. A sphere of energy is deployed that absorbs weapon fire both externally and internally, and provides great on-the-fly cover. However, like Door Shields, it can be passed through freely, leaving more careless players susceptible to a melee kill.

Speaking of dealing damage, Halo 3 comes packed with an arsenal of weapons familiar to any Halo veteran. One particular classic, the Assault Rifle, makes a comeback version 2.0 style with less ammunition but a greater range and more punch, making it an effective starting weapon. The devastating turrets can now be lifted free and carried by hand. Then there are the new toys, like the Spiker, a dual-wieldable gun that fires off sharp metal bolts at a frightening rate and that sports a wicked looking blade that curves out under its barrel, allowing for rather brutal melee attacks. There’s also Spike Grenades which stick to any surface and leave their mark with shredding spikes when detonated. Like the detached gun turret, the Missile Pod is a huge weapon that slows Spartans considerably, but is powerful enough to upstage the Rocket Launcher. Loaded with eight missiles that can also home in on vehicles, a showdown against one of these is something to back away from. So is the talk of the town, the Spartan Laser. Another weapon meant to take down vehicles it’s powerful and precise enough to burn through multiple enemies, the only catch being its lengthy charge time.

Unfortunately, there is only one new vehicle for players to practice taking out with the Spartan Laser – the Mongoose. This four-wheeler doesn’t pack any firepower of its own, but compensates by achieving incredible velocity. The speed-demon also seats for two, allowing a Spartan buddy to take the bitch seat as a gunner. Like the Mongoose, the Man-Cannon is easily one of the coolest and most fun additions to the Halo series. While not a traditional vehicle, the Man-Cannon launches objects such as fusion cores (they go “boom”), vehicles (yes, with drivers included) and even players great distances and replaces the transporters from Halo 3’s predecessors. The Warthog and Ghost also appear in the Beta, both handling similarly to their performance in Halo 2.

While only three maps are included in the Beta, each is unique enough to stave off boredom. The successor to Blood Gulch, Valhalla is a valley with wide open terrain perfect for vehicular travel, rolling green hills, and sporadic rock outcroppings that act as ideal defense against snipers. Snowbound is an arctic field with two Covenant facilities hiding the remnants of a Forerunner installation. Not enclosed by mountain ranges or visible barriers, Snowbound boasts a field much larger in scope – but don’t let this fool you. The boundaries are marked by sentry guns that let loose their bullets if players get too close. Though smaller than it seems, the close-quarters and indoor combat in Snowbound leads to some rather memorable firefights – especially with the inclusion of Door Shields. Last is High Ground, reminiscent of Zanzibar (Halo 2). Its savanna-esque landscape is likely to become the most popular of the Beta’s maps. Pinched within valley walls, the invading teams will find it a challenge to gain control of the map’s singular base. Still, breaking through its defenses or keeping managing to keep control is one of the most thrilling scenarios in Halo 3’s Beta, and can lead to some pretty dirty showdowns.

So there you have it, a small taste of Xbox 360’s most hyped game. Though Halo 3 is only in its Beta phase, it is so well polished and strong visually as-is that we can only wonder what the final product will be like. With the beta ending June 7, all that remains to be seen now is Halo 3’s single player campaign. Be ready to finish the fight September 25, 2007.